Help: It’s Unexpected, So, Don’t Waste It

This weekend I was reminded of the power of social interaction. The little intricacies of the social dance that ripple out in waves. Like whether a smile has teeth, whether eye contact is sustained, the speaker’s stance, and even the little nuances—a furrowed brow—a facial tremor. All of it can mean so much more and at the same time almost nothing. Depends on who you ask, I suppose, but, for those willing to look, all of it conveys a world of information. A biological data distribution so complex that some of us have dedicated our entire lives studying it. Explorers in a land of obtuse—illogical—constructs built upon an evolutionary amalgamation that rarely does Spring Cleaning.

Yet, in that social dance, lies humanities greatest strength. Communication. This ability, though not our only advantage, is one of the largest contributors to our global dominance. Yes, other animals can communicate, but not at our level—not with as much sophistication. Can you imagine a foreman trying to build a house if all they could do is grunt at the roofer? The plumber? The electrician?

Life would be much more … difficult. So, you may be asking, what’s my point, why talk about all this talking? Well, it’s simple, and like I said before, “this weekend I was reminded of the power of social interaction.” The primary proponent of that power? The main conveyor of communications’ ability to make humanity stand out in a world of such diversity?

Help.

Plain-old help. The ability to simply and effectively render someone aid. Without it, we would be cast adrift in a severely complex world. Mute, blind, ships passing each other in a dark perilous sea. Now, the help I am talking about is not the kind you would use to build a house. No, mine is more abstract. Notes on how to more effectively market my book, advice on how to write to impress, being a ‘pantser’ vs a ‘plotter,’ and the inspiration to just keep pushing onwards. That was the type of help I received during this big social event, and I was all for it. I just hope I was as helpful to them as they were to me.

Now, the gods must have favored me this last weekend, because I also received physical help, in the form of some car repairs. My wife’s friends’ husband is a mechanic and after many assurances that he wanted to help us change the starter in my wife’s car we relented to his offer.

So, we sent him some money for the proposed part and promised to buy him dinner in recompense. I of course tried my best to offer a hand and though I was relegated to “tighten this bolt and clamp that hose,” I did my darndest to be useful. Though, without him we would be probably left with a half-disassembled engine (Yes, Nissan puts their starters in very weird locations—don’t ask) and a very large invoice from the not-so-benevolent mechanics at the local shop. His knowledge was invaluable, and though the communication was more in line with the stereotypical ornery cursing one would expect from a mechanic it still took the form of its most useful self—help.

Now, I am not always so enlightened so as to see these little bits of help that come my way. In fact, I am usually rather oblivious to their initial attempts and have found myself looking back at many missed opportunities and thinking, you fool.

Sometimes it takes that hindsight to recognize it, but I always—ALWAYS— recognize how beneficial it is. I just hope that I do before and not after the fact. Yet, whenever I do and I finally get my head out of my proverbial ass, I realize what I stumbled upon. The legendary gift horse, and I have to stop looking at its mouth.

For example, a couple of weeks ago I was hit with a rather unexpected response to my somewhat discouraged post regarding the travails of marketing (Link here: https://mitchelllecoultre.com/2025/05/20/fun-with-marketing/). That response was … (insert drum roll here) … you guessed it—help! Assistance in the way of an old friend that I hadn’t heard from in years. Of course, I won’t name that friend, because that would be uncouth, but they will know who they are.

At first, I was rather taken aback at this unbidden offer of aid. My shock obvious; debilitating. I stumbled; I fumbled; and I possibly dropped the ball, but that stalwart semi-stranger kept stolidly on, insisting on helping me. The goofball that I am.

So, I buckled down and jumped on board with what assistance they were offering, and I couldn’t be more satisfied. It gave me hope in the face of a difficult journey. A new spark to carry on with my writing aspirations, because if someone believed in me enough to lend their support like that, then maybe I am onto something. Maybe this whole writing business is worth it, and I am not just some hack trying to make it in a field I don’t fully understand. Truly, it was like water to a parched throat—sustenance against starvation.

Now, am I some sort of huge success because of all this help? No, but am I closer to my dreams—my goals? Absolutely! And (as far as the book help as concerned) like any small business (because that’s kind of what being an author is, a small business) my name got out there, visibility was granted to my brand, and morale was lifted for my beleaguered spirit. All critical ingredients to the success of a startup. Just what I needed when I needed it, and, I think, we could all do with a little help once in a while. Who knows, maybe I will be able to return the favor one day. If not to this unnamed friend, to someone else in need.

Maybe one day I will come into someone’s orbit and see they need help. Because that’s kind of what it felt like, like a shooting star from out of nowhere; it’s trajectory unpredictable. That was until its light streaked across the sky. So, if you are lucky enough to be in the presence of one who wishes to help—just like the shooting star—you best make your wish plain and true. Because the magic will fade, and the help will dissolve if you let it go to waste.

Don’t be overly proud; don’t think you can ‘go it alone.’ After all, maybe you do need help. If you don’t, at least you know that it’s there. So, be gracious when help is offered, and, if given the chance, be ready to lend a hand … it could be just what your friend needs.

Thank you all for reading!

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Or if you’re so inclined check out my book, Shards of Ember, available on Amazon or possibly through request at your local bookstore (pssst that means its available wholesale to commercial entities through IngramSpark).